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Plato’s Symposium

In his Symposium Plato describes a time when humans were perfect unified hermaphroditic beings -half male & half female. But somewhere along the lines they broke the rules, and as a punishment whatever god or gods were in charge of the show at that time, split everyone in into male and female halves and cast them to the four corners of the Earth (as the earth was flat back then and a perfect square). Since this time our souls have been wandering the planet searching for their ‘other half’.

Modern life has forced me to accept that the object of ones affections may not be another man or woman per se; it could be an animal or tree, for example. But where Plato’s logic is scuppered by contemporary sexuality, is when we enter the realm of ‘Objectophilia‘. I recently watched a documentary about this: there was a woman who was in love with a building – she wasn’t simply in awe of the scale, craftsmanship or the design of the building – she actually had sexual desires that could only be satisfied by being intimate with the exterior of this particular magnificent architectural erection. There was even a man on there who got married to a toaster! I was totally shocked – and I suspect he was too – several times. Now I am pretty sure that buildings were around during the time Plato envisaged in his Symposium, but I am 100% positive that electrical kitchen appliances were not.